I rode the MRT going home after a wedding hosting this evening. I had to do the “round trip” to be able to rest my sore feet after hours of being under the stilettos. After laying down my butt and getting ready for forty winks I had a glimpse of a cute kid (they are one of my weaknesses especially the cute Chinese/Japanase kids). He has nowhere else to sit but on the train floor.
Tonight, I made a different choice. I ignored him. What do I mean by that? I would normally do the “right” thing – what our values education teacher taught when we were in high school, what is pleasing to the eyes and what melts the heart. I would happily offer my seat. Same goes if I see an old lady, pregnant woman or a handicapped. But yeah, tonight I chose a different path. I told myself, “Just now”, maybe I’m just too tired or maybe I just want a new perspective.
Then I started to think, no – be AWARE, of what’s going on. Where does RIGHT AND WRONG originated? Who labels whether a thing, situation or people are right or wrong?
Then I came up with a conclusion. THERE’S ALWAYS TWO SIDES OF A STORY even if let’s say both speaks the TRUTH.
Culture, personal values, relationships, experiences and a gang of other factors would present itself and justify whether something is right or wrong. On my personal opinion, being right gives us that boost in our ego. Whether we are conscious of it or not, there is a sense of satisfaction when we do the right thing. You know that lines like “ I told you so”, “ I knew it!”, “I am right and you are wrong” , “I have my reasons” blah blah blah! The TRUTH, as Echart Tolle told in one of his books – is a story we have to believe in, in which means, a BUNDLE OF THOUGHTS. This is a great gift and a great curse at the same time.
I have my fair share of stories in discerning whether a thing is right or wrong. I am good at justifying a certain event in my life just to give a lift to my ego. Before, it kills me when I’m wrong, I would be mashed down to the core, frightened and feeling annihilated. I would not stop thinking why a certain thing could have happened to me. But things are quite different now, I still don’t have that much wisdom and understanding but Im starting to realize that the unfortunate events in my life have made me a better person. I face the situation, deal with it, cry or curse if I want to but after that I would let go. Blaming someone else would not do any good, hard to digest but that’s the “truth” for me.
My train of thoughts stopped there.
The MRT is still crowded, one woman screaming for being squashed, another was wailing and saying her mobile phone was gone, there’s this woman who wasn’t able to go down at the right station. The train carries people from all walks of life, too many stories to tell and mine is just a tiny little portion of it but all of us wanting to be right and fearful of being wrong. One last scene I witnessed before going down, a girl with fiery red hair and uncanny outfit gets off the station, I can see people giving her a ridiculed look, I suddenly saw bubble thoughts popping out of their heads with mocking words towards the girl. I just gave out a forceful sigh.
I might just really get a tattoo after all!
originally written December 18, 2010
No comments:
Post a Comment